To Bear Witness

This year, I am working on being more present. I am working on stepping into a space where time does not exist. For someone like me, and maybe someone like you too, it's hard as heck.

Most of my life is about timing: it’s time to go to college, it’s time to get married, it’s time to have children, it’s time to start dinner, it’s time to do homework, it’s time to go to sleep, it’s time to get up, it’s time to get ready for school, church, a meeting, run an errand, have fun, do nothing, anything in general has a timing to it. I am either waiting for time or thinking about a time that’s passed. The present is a gateway, and often times the gateway feels like a trap.

Today, I learned that to be present is to bear witness, and, wow, that turned the trap on its side. I have witnessed many things that shook me to the core, I think we all have. I did not and do not like being a witness because I felt and feel helpless. So just imagine my experience in trying to be present wrapped up in being a witness—the present helpless.

This year, I am learning to be more present, to bear witness...phew...to crawl out of that trap.